Does Anybody Actually Enjoy Life? I Do -- Now.

I just answered a question on Quora :

Life: Does anybody actually enjoy life?

1

Joanne Shortell, Mental Health Advocate

Despite serious mental illness (bipolar disorder and a bunch of anxiety disorders), frequent migraines, violent childhood, being next door to the first tower hit on 9/11, being divorced from the love of my life, and other painful issues, I actually enjoy life. This wasn't true earlier in my life even though fewer of those issues had happened and my mental illness was less severe. I spent decades just trying to get through life until my children were independent of me so I could commit suicide with a clear conscience.

There is actually a branch of psychology that studies what makes people feel good about their lives: Positive Psychology (see Using the new Positive Psychology on the UPenn website). Positive psychologists do scientific research to establish what works and what doesn't.  Here are some of the basics that they've found consistently:

The keys to having a life you enjoy are not what you think they are. In the long term it's not

I have bipolar disorder; I am strong; I am happy. Join me.

I have bipolar disorder . . .

I suffer from bipolar II. This is not bipolar "lite" -- people with bipolar II have a suicide rate at least as high as those with bipolar I. My particular type of bipolar II, one that has been permanently accelerated and amplified by repeated inappropriate prescription of antidepressants, is the most disabling and dangerous. Although I had a long career and was a workaholic, I was knocked out of the workforce and determined to be 100% disabled. I don't have a "mild" case of bipolar disorder; I am strongly bipolar.

I am strong . . .

I've suffered from mental illness since before puberty, but I raised two children (including a stint as a single Mom), started my own business, had a 3-decade career that began with clerical work and ended with a six-figure technology management position (all without a single college credit).  I never was fired or collected unemployment, never was arrested, and never had even a moving violation, I survived childhood in a violent household, marriage to a 19-year-old cop before I was out of high school, teenage motherhood 10 months later, a nasty divorce and custody suit (which I won), bankruptcy (due to the custody suit), and 9/11.

I am happy . . .

In 2002 I was heading towards marriage with the love of my life. I was a workaholic technologist with a comfortable income. Anxiety disorders and a misdiagnosed mood disorder had troubled me since childhood. In 2012 I was divorced; my mood disorder was more severe (ultra-rapid cycling, drug-resistant bipolar); my anxiety was worse; I was going through menopause; I'd been unable to work for years; my only income was a social security check that was 85% less than my last paycheck; and . . . my life was so good my friends and family were jealous. 

Join me . . .

I learned how to be strong, and I learned how to be happy. I could have done it better and sooner, if I'd had